What is Patience?

What is patience?

Here at True Balance Karate in Downers Grove, Illinois, we have a social emotional learning program called True Character. I’m Master H, the owner and chief instructor here at the studio. And I have two master’s degrees in education. And we’ve put this program together to meet the needs of our youngest students who are 3 or 4, and our oldest student who is 85.

And this month we are talking about patience. We’re introducing the topic as, what is it? What is patience? What is patience going to look like? What is it going to sound like? What is it going to feel like? And patience is one of those things that we have to practice all the time. All the time, because we will find ourselves in a rushed situation or a stressed situation, or things aren’t working out the way we want them to work out, and then we start to feel like we’re losing our patience. So patience is something that is one of those things that we’re always, always working on.

And when we’re talking about it for our younger kids, they can understand it in the idea of taking turns, and the idea of sharing, and the idea of waiting for a few moments. When you’re 2, 3, 4, your patience is very, very limited because the concept of time isn’t even there yet. Let alone the idea of, “I need to wait. I don’t just get it right now.” And it’s one of those things that we have to grow over time.

So when they’re younger and they’re practicing their patience, they might just be asked to wait 30 seconds or 1 minute or 3 minutes. And then over time, as kids grow, the level of wait time can grow a little bit too. It’s similar to putting a kid in timeout. When they’re younger, it only lasts for so long before they’ve completely forgotten what they did in the first place that got them there. And then as they get older, then they understand the relationship between the consequence and the behavior, and then it makes more sense.

Practicing patience is the same thing. If they’re not able to express exactly what it is that they need or want, then it turns into a temper tantrum. Then it turns into a 5-year-old who looks as though they are impatient and have lost their patience. And to some extent, there were times that my kids, when I’d asked them what was wrong, what is it that they needed, they couldn’t even remember, which also led into complaining, whining, carrying on. “I just don’t know.” Because I had them wait too long. So there’s this really good balance between the two.

How do we teach them to practice patience? Wait without getting upset, but still making sure that they are able to be heard, seen, taken care of, to the point where they haven’t forgotten what that looks like.

And then when we get into junior high years, they understand a little bit more. Although if you ask my two kids, they don’t like waiting, but I look at them and I say, “You know what? Nobody does.” Now we’re waiting at the dentist. We’re waiting at the doctor. We’re waiting in all of these different places, the grocery store and standing in line.

I mean, a lot of what we do on a day-to-day basis is practicing our patience, waiting for our turn for sports, or waiting for our turn to take care of our groceries in the grocery store line, or to even as adults. We have to practice our patience when we’re driving and we’re waiting our turn to merge onto the highway.

So this idea of patience is that it’s literally everywhere. It is everywhere we go. And yes, sometimes we’re going to lose it. Sometimes we’re going to yell when we shouldn’t yell. Sometimes we’re going to cry when we shouldn’t cry. And it happens. It does. And the more we can teach our students how to practice their patience, the more we can implement some of the strategies that we’re going to talk about this month, the more we will be able to wait without getting upset and still make sure that everything that we need to get done gets done. So this month is all about practicing our patience.

Thanks, and I’ll see you on the mat!

True Balance Karate was founded in 2012 by Master Sue and Paul Helsdon.

We offer kids karate lessons for pre-school children ages 3-6 and elementary age kids ages 7 and up. These lessons are designed to develop the critical building blocks kids need — specialized for their age group — for school excellence and later success in life.

Our adult martial arts training is a complete adult fitness and conditioning program for adults who want to lose weight, get (and stay) in shape, or learn self-defense in a supportive environment.

Instructors can answer questions or be contacted 24 hours of the day, 7 days a week at 630-663-2000. You can also contact us here. True Balance Karate is at 406 Ogden Ave Downers Grove Illinois, 60515 (next to CVS) Check out our Facebook!