Partner in Parenting – Month 1: Clothes & Laundry Challenge

Hello!
Master Helsdon here — welcome to the first month of our series;  Partner in Parenting to Raise Independent Kids.

We talked in a previous video about why we’re launching this program. At True Balance Karate, we’re not just here to build strong martial artists — we’re here to help build strong, confident, independent human beings who are ready to face the world on their own.

So this month’s challenge?
Clothes and laundry.

Yep. We’re starting simple but important.

Let Them Choose (Yes, Even the Mismatched Stuff)

We want kids to start making their own decisions and taking charge of their own lives. That starts with the everyday stuff — like picking out what to wear.

We’ve already seen some amazing pictures of little ones in the silliest, most mismatched outfits — Christmas socks, rain boots on a sunny day, and the biggest smiles you’ve ever seen. And you know what?
They are so proud.

That feeling of “I did this!” is powerful. When a child dresses themselves, puts their own clothes away, or even does their own laundry — they begin building the confidence that says, I can make decisions and handle things on my own.

Parents: Don’t Swoop In

One of the biggest parts of this challenge is letting your child own the experience — even if they walk out of the house looking a little wild.

Here’s the thing:
Your child’s outfit is not a reflection of your parenting. When I see a little one walk into the studio in rain boots and shorts, I don’t think “Why did Mom let them do that?” I think, “Way to go, Mom and Dad! Your kid made a decision today.”

This is independence. This is growth.

A Quick Story About Decision-Making

Our son is a wrestler. One morning he had an early tournament and tried to get me to drive him. I said, “Dude, I didn’t spend all this money on car insurance for me to get up early.” So he drove himself — figured out directions, picked up a friend, and made it on time. All on his own.

That afternoon, he came home and took a nap… a really long nap. We debated — do we wake him up or let the consequence play out?

We let him sleep. He woke up feeling miserable and couldn’t fall asleep that night until 3:30am. The next day at dinner, he looked awful. Hungover from a nap, basically. And his sister — home from college — gave him a hard time about it.

But here’s the thing: He learned.
If we had intervened, he wouldn’t have experienced that consequence in a safe, low-risk environment. No job was lost. No class failed. Just a valuable life lesson.

Let Them Be Cold (Sometimes)

Spring in Chicagoland is wild. One day it’s 80°, the next it’s 20°.

So yes, it’s okay for your baby to be cold. It’s okay for them to make a choice and feel the consequence.

Let’s be clear — we’re not saying let them freeze in dangerous weather. If it’s a polar vortex, you make sure they’re bundled up. If it’s Grandma’s birthday and you’re going to a nice restaurant, yeah, they wear a collared shirt.

But on a regular day? Let them make the call. Say, “It’s cold today — you might want a jacket.” If they insist on shorts and a spring shirt, fine. They’ll learn.

We had one of our kids stick his arm outside the sliding glass door in the morning to decide what to wear. “If my arm gets cold, I wear long sleeves. If it doesn’t, I wear short sleeves.” Kid logic — surprisingly sound!

From Picking Clothes to Doing Laundry

This challenge grows with them. When they’re little, it’s about getting themselves dressed — even if the socks don’t match. By age five, they should be able to pick out their own clothes.

Not sure about their decision-making? Put season-appropriate clothes in the bottom drawers. Let them pick from there. That’s your compromise.

As they get older, add responsibilities:

• Start putting laundry away

• Then move on to doing laundry

• In our house, by 10 years old, they do all of it — wash, dry, fold, and put it away

The best moment? When your kid yells at you to get your stuff out of the dryer. That’s success. That’s ownership. That’s independence.

Let’s Build Confidence Together

This is what we want for our kids — real, earned confidence. The kind that says, “I’ve got this.”

So here’s your challenge this month:
✅ Let your kids pick out their clothes
✅ Let them dress themselves
✅ Let them start managing their own laundry

Post your wins on Facebook!
📸 Share pictures of their big smiles, wild outfits, or them lugging that laundry basket around. Let’s celebrate these small moments that build big confidence.

We’re proud to be your partner in parenting.

Thanks, and we’ll see you on the mat.

– Master Helsdon